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#188 +(1145)- [X]

<Acero> i'm going to try natural penis enlargement ok?
<Acero> if it works i'll let you guys know and we can be the channel with the biggest penises on efnet
<WwMrTwW> penis pump!? weights? implants!?
<Acero> it's some excercise you do with your hand

#843 +(486)- [X]

*** Joins: SYch0 (Zack@pm-5-37.tellink.net)
<SYch0> coo
<SYch0> just put my old computer in my new case
<ikk|q3a> wow!
<TheFlux2k> duz it magically run faster?
<SYch0> butholes
<SYch0> wtf do I even talk to u ppl
*** Quits: SYch0 ( <k!15b7>)

#863 +(625)- [X]

<rob`> where does an irish family go for vacation?
<rob`> to a different bar

#1320 +(388)- [X]

(pervert) roy: get off your "would be heterosexual if i had enough options to have a preference" ass and go get some :P

#3345 +(226)- [X]

<thc\ip> just cus i have like a hjalf oz of weed in my keyboard...
<thc\ip> dont mean i cant spell

#4260 +(386)- [X]

<McMoo> My computer's maximum uptime: 4w 2d 15h 39m 3s, set on Tue, Feb 19 2002 at 5:53:00p
<McMoo> LOOK AT HOW BIG MY DICK IS
<McMoo> 4 WEEKS BIG!!!!!!!

#5473 +(268)- [X]

<ExCon> ihave one wish b4 i goto army rho :)
<ExCon> op for 1 day :D
<[SuN]> im not that soft :P
<ExCon> what if i die and never come back ?;D
<[SuN]> ill make a bot called ExCon and give it ops
<ExCon> oh..i feel honored
<ExCon> :D
<[SuN]> ;)

#7769 +(691)- [X]

<n> hi...okay, i know exactly what i want!...you should be older than myself...larger in stature than me...preferably Well~Hung..intelligent..cool..funloving..easy going..gentle with a firm touch..you should just relish the the role of Top Daddy who takes what he wants!...me: i am Totally shaved and smooth all over(everywhere!)..soft smooth tanned complexion..i LOVE wearing sexy little panties and being playfully~submissive to your advances in an almost femme manner
<n> lol
<booger> i wonder how she shaves around her own asshole
<booger> thats gotta hurt
<pat> nair?
<booger> what if she gets nair up her ass?
<pat> e-mail her and find out
<n> uhm
<n> thats a he
<booger> OMG

#7900 +(121)- [X]

<@LoneWo|f> once the divorce is final...i'm getting snipped...and if spermicide didn't taste so bad...i'd kiss condoms goodbye!

#8025 +(67)- [X]

<steveac> tough to do when you type with 1 finger on the keyboard and yoyur dick in your other hand

#8063 +(61)- [X]

<HotelManager> plz com in avatar
<Avatar> no
<HotelManager> fine then youtr baned but when you want to get on the channell come and get me and i will unban you

#8143 +(141)- [X]

<Bieeardo> GURPS!
<Bieeardo> It's not just for bodily noise jokes, anymore!

#12169 +(230)- [X]

<Guyp> i want to join the red army and then kill the capitalist snake!
<Guyp> hmmm
<Guyp> you cant join the russian army online :(

#12768 +(2019)- [X]

<eltawater> anyone know the name of a (mathematical) function which calculates how many times a number M fits into a number N?
<eltawater> i.e. 20,4 = 5
<eltawater> ?
<Biddle> Division?
<AlleyCat> divisor
<eltawater> er
<eltawater> *smacks head into desk*

#13213 +(8053)- [X]

<Spazz> Seems like when I say "FUCK" you get an EOF error  :o
*** Quits: Ranto (~recon@newax2-042.dialup.optusnet.com.au) (Read error: EOF from client)
*** Joins: Ranto (~recon@newax2-042.dialup.optusnet.com.au)
<Bartolimis> fuck
*** Quits: Ranto (~recon@newax2-042.dialup.optusnet.com.au) (Read error: EOF from client)
*** Joins: Ranto (~recon@newax2-042.dialup.optusnet.com.au)
<Bartolimis> fuck
<Spazz> fuck
*** Quits: Ranto (~recon@newax2-042.dialup.optusnet.com.au) (Read error: EOF from client)
*** Joins: Ranto (~recon@newax2-042.dialup.optusnet.com.au)
<Spazz> fuck
<Bartolimis> stop
*** Quits: Ranto (~recon@newax2-042.dialup.optusnet.com.au) (Read error: EOF from client)
*** Joins: Ranto (~recon@newax2-042.dialup.optusnet.com.au)
<Bartolimis> we're done >:)
<Ranto> hmh?
<Spazz> Your client got an error...
<Bartolimis> yeah, we're done saying fuck
<Spazz> everytime we said f***
*** Quits: Ranto (~recon@newax2-042.dialup.optusnet.com.au) (Read error: EOF from client)
*** Joins: Ranto (~recon@newax2-042.dialup.optusnet.com.au)
<Spazz> Quit saying fukc
<Bartolimis> my bad
<Spazz> fuck*
*** Quits: Ranto (~recon@newax2-042.dialup.optusnet.com.au) (Read error: EOF from client)
*** Joins: Ranto (~recon@newax2-042.dialup.optusnet.com.au)
<Icc> Someone says fuck and he drops ?
*** Quits: Ranto (~recon@newax2-042.dialup.optusnet.com.au) (Read error: EOF from client)

#13687 +(843)- [X]

<Darth-Phenom> But the SNES was only good for its games, much like the PSX
<Pedgey> Well what else you gonna use it for? Making toast?!!?!

#18234 +(94)- [X]

<C-rEs:#slackware> isnt it recommended to keep ports apart? like you dont want to use port 1035 and 1036 at the same time?

#25357 +(1007)- [X]

<Talwin> I masturbate cause my hand doesn't give me any backtalk
<Talwin> I'm like "Get down there bitch"
<Talwin> And its all "!! k"
<Talwin> And afterwards it cleans itself off and doesn't say a thing
<soap> i some times make a little puppet with my hand, and make it talk before i masturbate with it, saying things like "no, please...i'm a virgin!" and stuff like that.  you know, resisting a bit.  i like foreplay when i masturbate.

#27491 +(374)- [X]

<+Hotaru> Hmm, 1 in 32 Americans are either in jail or prison, on probation, or on parole.
<@Riffraff> COOL!
<+Vulpes> I didn't know we had that many politicians.

#27863 +(1319)- [X]

(@BigTruck): 'magine havin' to go to the emergency room and fill out that little questionaire paper at the beginning "description of ailment"
(@Phitz): hahahaha
(@BigTruck): i got a nerf football stuck in my hootie
*** Joins: hootie (blah@209.250.58.28)
(@BigTruck): :o
(@Phitz): wtf
(@BigTruck): my mind just exploded
(@Phitz): *nod*

#33950 +(174)- [X]

<Furvert> Washington's the only state where you can see signs like:  Tractor Rentals, Engines Rebuilt, Espresso.

#34113 +(360)- [X]

<DKuntz> is it bad for me to have a pet peeve about people usin "r" instead of "are" and "u" instead of "you" (and so on)
<Lath> Er, no
<DKuntz> I really hate when people do "how r u 2day?"
<IJ> I've heard of data compression, but this is ridiculous.

#34221 +(22)- [X]

*** Armagon has quit IRC (Quit: [07:45pm] ĚDide_BotĚ I last saw Bel's ass, I think it got sold on ebay 2 weeks 2 days 3 hours 37 minutes 55 seconds ago.)

#34309 +(186)- [X]

<Warokii> i got home this morning at 9am after driving all night hauling animal feed from wentachee
<Warokii> and all i wanted to do was sleep
<Warokii> so i slept
<Warokii> and i had 1 hour of sleep in me when somebody started ringing the door bell
<Warokii> and wouldnt quit
<Warokii> and i was rightously peeeved for havin my sleep disturbed
<Warokii> i answered the door with an half assed mind and thinking it was that tupperware saleswoman who kept coming to my block to sell plastic
<Warokii> and i gave the woman a piece of my mind in the most nasty way
<WillZ> and?
<Warokii> .... turns out it was my mom.
<kyokki> LOL! that's not good
<Warokii> i think im off her will :(

#34675 +(311)- [X]

<gh5046> Mokey: How big are your boobs?
<Mokey> 38 aa
<gh5046> yo baby, you're shaped like an overweight 13 year-old
<Mokey> yep
<Mokey> that's me.
<gh5046> that so made me seem like an asshole

#35178 +(231)- [X]

<@Deosyne> Yeah. I'm not admitting to anyone, especially my kid, that I stuck a vacuum in my ass

#35373 +(517)- [X]

<Snow> Heard outside construction site on way to lunch:
<Snow> <sound that a nail gun makes> "AAAAAAAAAAAAH!"

#37954 +(727)- [X]

[@Unknown_Source] : Dogs are weird and dumb
[@djjason] : Agreed
[@Unknown_Source] : I mean, wave the biscuit, and the dumbass dogs comes
* Unknown_Source waves a biscuit
[Join (#afterhoursdjs)] : [DJAngelicon (~DJAngelic@12-231-113-90.client.attbi.com)]
[@Unknown_Source] : ...

#41743 +(216)- [X]

<+aisha-fan> dude
<+aisha-fan> my moms boss brougt in a "new" penteium I
<+aisha-fan> those things r so old their obsoleet
<@MewMew[WC3]> As is correct spelling, I presume.

#43113 +(626)- [X]

<Murdercules> once, i accidently walked in on my sister when she was taking a shower, and i saw her tities and her body, i was like, damn! who's that fine chick in my shower, then i saw my sister's face, and i was like, damn, i didn't know my sister was that hot

#45059 +(21)- [X]

<wild`> Afghanistan Quick Facts: Life Expectancy 46.62 male, 45.1 female (2000 est.) <<<soon to be revised

#49573 +(175)- [X]

Ssecondstringr85: i love thanksgiving
TwilightKnight00: me 2
Ssecondstringr85: when the line between what you should eat and what you can eat is blurred

#53986 +(37)- [X]

<Vented> I wake up and go "fuck work, fuck work"
<Vented> i give my thanks to my job :)
<TheJesus> that's the trick
<TheJesus> if you mess up and do <go to work> <say fuck work, fuck work> in the wrong order, you get in trouble
<Vented> hahah :)
<Vented> you can always delete the two files, then recreate them in the correct order
<Vented> or just "touch" <go to work> so it has a later date stamp
<Vented> then no one will know what happened :)
<TheJesus> hahahaha

#56149 +(263)- [X]

<Diplomatic> Christina -> We wanna see your bewbies
<Christina> bewbies?  What are you? 3?

#59687 +(249)- [X]

<+MegamanX2K> buh
<@Dragon_Ninja> HIya X
<+MegamanX2K> Diablo 2 pisses me off
<@Dragon_Ninja> what is pissing you off about it now?
<+MegamanX2K> stupid fucking Venom Lord rush
<+MegamanX2K> who do they think they are, Zerg?
<@Dragon_Ninja> LOL
<+MegamanX2K> god, I was waiting for Diablo to go "KEKEKEKEKEKEKEKEKEKEKEKE ^______________________^"

#61533 +(34)- [X]

<DarxusZzZ> it's like it's not reading the resolv.conf
<kuruption> Darxus, you're running linux?
<DarxusZzZ> on this machine? no, on the one I'm trying to fucking install gentoo on? yes
<kuruption> i have a FAQ for you on how to resolve that problem.... www.freebsd.org
<kuruption> hahaha

#76715 +(35)- [X]

<@Lufia> i'm bored so i'm fucking my server up
<@RATT> lol
<@RATT> Use a condom

#81811 +(109)- [X]

therealspm: u busy whackin off again
wispyspark: no it wasnt leting me

#81909 +(102)- [X]

<Wookie> gunkaaa??
<gunkbitch> gunkaaa is teh mastah haxor
<Wookie> gunkaaa??
<gunkbitch> gunkaaa: It's not rape if they can't say no.
<Wookie> :o
<gunkaaa> wtf
<gunkaaa> where did that come from

#81916 +(614)- [X]

<[FYAD]Chem-Commando> hey guys
<[FYAD]Chem-Commando> a man with dark skin just picked up my television and went out the door
<C_Cardigan> reparations for slavery
<C_Cardigan> not a thing you can do

#82150 +(188)- [X]

<Hyperian> ono pike * Hyperian kills pike
<Hyperian> found an article about pikes
<Hyperian> "invasive northern pike just won't die"
<pike|zZz> MOUHAHAHA!
<Hyperian> "pike could devastate fisheries"
<pike|zZz> MOUHAHAHAAH!
<Hyperian> "despite being poisoned, shocked, netted, hooked, and blown up, the nonative northern pike remains stronger than ever in Lake Davis."
* Hyperian shocks and poisons pike
<pike|zZz> BWAHAHA
<pike|zZz> YOU CANNOT GET RID OF THE PIKE!
* pike|zZz was kicked by Dyn|work (Dyn|work)

#106860 +(198)- [X]

<Kazimierz> the fast and the furious was full of homoerotic undertones
<Kazimierz> just you couldn't hear them under the loud music and loud car engines

#139480 +(293)- [X]

<AndyPunk> what is with all the publicity with people who have lost limbs in the war
<AndyPunk> wasn't the only reason we went into iraq was to dis-arm them?

#267287 +(931)- [X]

Tester Bob> Maybe Scott will get fired if we send really bad things over his company's network
Tester Bob> Porn
Tester Bob> Fuck
Tester Bob> Vagina
Abdullah> "Bush/Cheney in '04"

#403269 +(595)- [X]

<chiptuned> I just noticed that I have a worn out pattern in the shape of a boner on my underwear

#446429 +(952)- [X]

<Gladiator> Jesus christ, my mom is so fucking stupid
<Gladiator> She was complaining to me about how "all the french stereotype us"

#449287 +(1972)- [X]

<laertes> NAPLES, Italy (Reuters) - Christmas has never tasted this good. Thirty-two pastry chefs in the southern Italian city of Naples unveiled on Saturday what they say is the biggest ever nativity scene made entirely of chocolate.
<skolex> sweet jesus

#667747 +(257)- [X]

KrazyKanuk: the canadian customs people rule
KrazyKanuk: i get to the border right, coming from the us
KrazyKanuk: and the guard asks me if i have any weapons in the car
KrazyKanuk: im like, im CANADIAN, what do u think?
KrazyKanuk: he let me through without another word

#770519 +(518)- [X]

Allan: incidentally, my house is Zombie resistant.
Crysm: how so?
Allan: I wonder why that is
Allan: elevated first floor, strong steel doors.
Allan: the windows are out of reach, basically.
Crysm: it's next to a graveyard, man
Crysm: the planners had to think ahead
Allan: good point
Allan: ...dear god, I gave my house a zombie proofing assessment.
Allan: That's... a whole new level of something.

#810048 +(3231)- [X]

wtf9589: should i get the poster with 1 really hot girl or 5 pretty hot girls?
kickassmofo1111: duh get the one with five girls
kickassmofo1111: five tits are better than one
wtf9589: WTF HAVE YOU EVEN SEEN A GIRL???

0.1760 21096 quotes approved; 1511 quotes pending
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