#1013 +(351)- [X]
(iMike) i dont trust that britney spears has areolas that big
#1383 +(356)- [X]
<Guilty> Thank god I'm sensible and had myself neutered
#1429 +(277)- [X]
<Culex> Why did LatinKing get fired from the sperm bank? He got caught drinking on the job :)
#3181 +(1524)- [X]
<jip_> anyone know offhand how to make comments in lisp?
<Jumper> people still use lisp ?
<Liqd_Work> people started using lisp?
<MediArc> people can program?
<Jumper> ..people ?
<drlion> there was light?
#3615 +(531)- [X]
<DeathFist> hey, can u guys stop talking about racism and shit...its getting old...if you dont like it, then you dont have to own slaves, its as easy as that...
#4143 +(597)- [X]
<uneasier> would it be out of line if i were to request that my testes be softly nestled within your food receptacle?
<Jan__> mmm braized testicle
<Jan__> with a nice bottle of chianti
* uneasier runs away
#5652 +(198)- [X]
<JibbleWork> no amount of work would be able to get my clenched cheeks open
#6656 +(449)- [X]
(@TRCC|shot): directX 8.1 any good?
(@landje): i havnet pld it
(@ui|ICEMAN): dirext X isn't a game
(@landje): what is it
(@landje): if any;one puts that in their quit message i'll feckign kil ythe,
#8488 +(340)- [X]
<dr_rotcod> he's an ex marine and i was drunk so i said, "alright marine, kill me with one touch!"
<hakan> holy shit. wrong thing to say
<dr_rotcod> and all the sudden i was in some weird hold having my shoulder ripped apart
<dr_rotcod> and then i fell on the ground laughing/crying
<hakan> did it break??
<dr_rotcod> he looked at his hands and went, "oh my god! the demons of the american military have shone through and i am hopeless!! HOPELESS"
#12065 +(618)- [X]
*** Mank_Sleep is now known as Mank_DONOTBOTHERMANKHEISNOWLOO
*** Mank_DONOTBOTHERMANKHEISNOWLOO is now known as Mank_LOOKINGATCHICKSLICKEACHOT
*** Mank_LOOKINGATCHICKSLICKEACHOT is now known as Mank_PORNO
#14526 +(1459)- [X]
<oneo|SUMMER> the US has some of the best schools in the nation
#17162 +(136)- [X]
<\`es> fuck i just downloaded 5 crazytown mp3's. What the fuck is happening with me
#18126 +(277)- [X]
<Carlton>I see someone walking down the street wearing all black I think, "Probably has a favourite Linux distribution."
#18269 +(-214)- [X]
<Morphious> in 7 yrs ive hacked 200 people
#22174 +(440)- [X]
<Stooert> asian girls with big boobs rule
<RedXIII> they do
<Stooert> cuz its just so rare
<RedXIII> like a clown with a phd
#23364 +(150)- [X]
<Gentletouch> Adonai...one day you'lllearn...there are Much better things in life to lick then carpet ;D
<Adonai> yeah, like studying a grammar book
#24772 +(135)- [X]
<Daniel> maxi wants to unf her :D
<Haggis> saying maxi wants to unf her isnt a big deal :)
<Daniel> yer, but the fact that they live like 4 km from each other sweetens the deal :D
<Haggis> pie...with maxi, if the chick was _ALIVE_ it would sweeten the deal
#34856 +(178)- [X]
<Mek> my dad gets junkmail from all over the world
<Mek> hes had em from, belgium, france, austria, australia, Canada, America, Argentina, Russia and the Czech Republic
<Mek> and also Jamaica
<Paulio> its his mailorder bride catalogues
<Mek> you get them too??
#36530 +(42)- [X]
<The-Dude> I heard it involves placing a toilet paper tube up there and letting a hampster crawl in....then pull out the tube, leaving the hampster in there......
<Kanush> that is disgusting.......yet intriguining "
#40750 +(676)- [X]
<yah-yah> what is CAPS ABUSE?
<Nyarlathotep-> half of your question
#41756 +(145)- [X]
<citrus-> hehe, some guy called me a few weeks ago, asking if I would like more TV channels to watch. (Obviously selling some cable stuff) so I said 'Yes I would' and hung up
#46844 +(29)- [X]
> HyperShadowDC gets in barrel
(Scott) A barrel of homosexuals? Where do I sign up?!
#48616 +(35)- [X]
<Ear> andy: but Methodists think jebus and god are one.
<Ear> Which means he impregnated his mother with himself.
<andy> he was jerking it in the womb
#49888 +(674)- [X]
<GauHelldragon> we're playing scatergories
<GauHelldragon> and we got "R"
<GauHelldragon> "Fruit", "Infamous people" and "words associated with exersize"
<GauHelldragon> i put down "Richard Simmons" for all 3 :D
#51372 +(189)- [X]
<ragnarok2040> @_@, i have a mouse scratching directly above my head
<Uzzab0x> trailer mice O_o
* _absent 0_o CKY - Shock and Terror [3:07]
<ragnarok2040> :/ and i can't beat on the ceiling cuz it messes up the ceiling fan
<ragnarok2040> so i have to ignore it
<Uzzab0x> I pity j00 rag :D
<_absent> haha your trailer is infested with canadians
#59671 +(137)- [X]
<kv9> ive just adjusted my sitting position
<kv9> to conceal any possible sudden hardons
#59686 +(50)- [X]
<unrealer> who is good at medic here?
<unrealer> how long does it take blood which stuck in u're vain to dissove?
<unrealer> i think i popped my vain
<unrealer> its at my leg
<PInK-PSy> sucks to be you
<unrealer> .... ... ...
<BluWacky> I think you'd be in a lot more pain and howling for an ambulance if you'd really "popped a vein".
* PInK-PSy nods
<unrealer> well not really pop. more like the blood stream stuck
<unrealer> its all hard and shit
<unrealer> compair to my other leg
<PInK-PSy> dude, get off the computer
<PInK-PSy> and do something about it =
#64802 +(739)- [X]
<Thom> How can a guy be offended by male nudity?
<Thom> Did you have trouble showering?
<Thom> OH FUCK OH FUCK ITS A PENIS
#76003 +(193)- [X]
<edgeh> think i crapped myself
<edgeh> no wait, i went for a crap
<edgeh> damn my memory sucks
#80053 +(320)- [X]
<ICEMAN|SmurF> I wish my girlfriend went down as much as gamesnet
#81760 +(84)- [X]
<whiprush> #debian is pretty intense too ...
<whiprush> I don't see how anyone can get help in that place.
<ronelson> well whip, you just apt-get irc-logs when you need them :P
<whiprush> ronelson: can you?
#98638 +(418)- [X]
<KillaDawg> I don't want to move to Singapore with you. too humid
<PinkRydergurl> Well, you don't have to wear clothes..you can walk around naked like people in Africa..
<KillaDawg> Uhhhh, people in Africa have large penes, so they can comfortably walk around naked. I'm white; I'm not quite that well-endowed
<PinkRydergurl> Uhhhh, once again, we're talking about SINGAPORE, which is in ASIA....you're more "gifted" than you think you are...
#105199 +(717)- [X]
[anewname] CAPS LOCK IS LIKE CRUISE CONTROL FOR COOL
#109270 +(347)- [X]
<Melkor> ===== Question 9518/10000 =====
<Melkor> the chinese ideograph with two women under one roof means what?
<Melkor> Hint: @@@@@@@
<UltraSSJ> free porn
#112174 +(162)- [X]
(Omnicronx): i overclocked my penis and it caught on fire
#122456 +(42)- [X]
* Kranium has quit IRC (I'mmm Sailing away.......Set an open course for the virgin sea..... Cause i've got to be freeee, free to face the life t)
<Luigi30> Wait, I'm bored, I get to be the captain.
#155345 +(19)- [X]
<ArchNemesis> ARGUMENT FROM BLINDNESS (II)
<ArchNemesis> (1) God is love.
<ArchNemesis> (2) Love is blind.
<ArchNemesis> (3) Ray Charles is blind.
<ArchNemesis> (4) Therefore, Ray Charles is God.
<ArchNemesis> (5) Therefore, God exists.
<sasaphrass> stevie wonder is blind, and black.... i dont think that makes him god....
#167844 +(1069)- [X]
<ZS> Ouranophobia- Fear of heaven.
<Kevyn> What's scary about heaven?
<Phantomlord> dude, christians hang out there.
#209867 +(-60)- [X]
* FJ arranges M&M's on his keys
<FJ> mm mmmm m mmm mmm
#245572 +(301)- [X]
Eudox says: my god...
Eudox says: I'm really not used to sending letters
Eudox says: it just took my 10 minutes to work out I had to lick the thingy to make it stick :|
#371438 +(2769)- [X]
* ^haksor^ has joined #pipari
<^haksor^> anyone have a serial for Soldier of Fortune 2???
<^haksor^> not enough letters in that???
<tiltti> try adding -H0L3 to the end of it
#416835 +(509)- [X]
(@Shockwave) Windows 3.11 calculator is broken in an amusing way.
(@Shockwave) Put in 3.01 - 3 and it gives you 0, every time.
(@Shockwave) Hurray for flaws in MS's basic math table
(JIM_BOB7813) Well if you need a calculator to do that, you deserve that answer :P
#536798 +(562)- [X]
<NIGHTMARE> I'm black from the waist down.
<n10shun> How do you steal a TV with your feet?
#593434 +(1011)- [X]
reaper: knock knock
SaladTongo: Who's there
SaladTongo: shit i didn't think you'd find me here
#639797 +(2038)- [X]
<[BAD]Beef> I AM SO SMART
<[BAD]Beef> follow my reasoning
<[BAD]Beef> my comp has no floppy drive
<[BAD]Beef> so I go downstairs to make a boot floppy on another comp
<[BAD]Beef> I come back in my room with the floppy in my hand
<[BAD]Beef> and bang my head against the wall
#660278 +(735)- [X]
<Ethereal Souls> it gave me the "explorer.exe has generated errors"
<Ethereal Souls> BUT IT'S OK
<Ethereal Souls> An error log was created
<Ethereal Souls> which will be in Hex and tell me EVERYTHING I NEED TO KNOW
<Frag> Because, of course, you know EXACTLY what Windows stores in memory slot E35BA9564F
<Ethereal Souls> yeah
<Ethereal Souls> that's the line about it buttfucking me
#666428 +(1038)- [X]
TTim2627: i try to restrain from illegal activities on sundays
igcatastrophe:really? I don't. i figure, gods resting, get him in his blindspot
#724962 +(1797)- [X]
<VFR8> I was driving home today and I saw the best license plate
<VFR8> 56K SRY
#737318 +(978)- [X]
<Python> Did you fall from a shooting star?
<silly_girlie> ahh sure why not
<GLT23> because your face looks like it slammed into earth at 1500 mph? is that the end of the pickup line?
#961513 +(143)- [X]
<xxx> There's apparently some Mexican restaurant somewhere in Europe that has the slogan, "Mexican food so authentic Donald Trump built 4 walls around it."